Planet Remains in Flames; Young People Understandably Terrified

As any teenager who’s ever had to spend 30 minutes explaining to their parents how to reset a modem will tell you, younger generations often get stuck dealing with older people’s problems. Perhaps there’s no better example of this than the current state of Earth’s environment— namely, the fact that it’s gone to shit. Pollution, deforestation, lack of renewable energy sources, the hole in the ozone layer single handedly created by cans of hairspray in the 80’s, you name it. People really dropped the ball when it came to taking care of the planet.

Sharpie Gate: Trump, Meteorologist-in-Chief

In a regular society, mistakes are made – it’s a natural human phenomenon. Perfection may be something we strive for, but it’s impossible to achieve. People have to learn to take their mistakes, apologize for them, and use it to improve themselves in the future. Unfortunately, this isn’t a skill President Trump has seemed to master yet.

Everyone Wins, Fordham Still Loses in Latest College Rankings

In his annual address to the University community regarding Fordham’s standing in the latest college rankings, Fr. McShane led with an old favorite: “I am writing to report on this year’s University rankings, in which I’m afraid we’ve had mixed success.” The Rankings Email always begins with this line, or some variation of it, such as 2018’s “I am writing to report that it has been a mixed week for Fordham in the rankings,” or 2017’s tragic, “Unfortunately, Fordham dipped from 60 to 61.”

Stoking the Flames

Around 4 a.m. on September 14th, ten drones flew over Saudi Arabi sinking a total of nineteen missiles into Aramco oil processing facilities in Abqaiq and Khurais. Fourteen of the strikes destroyed storage tanks, three damaged processing trains, and the remaining two did not hit any infrastructure or equipment. Thankfully, no one died in the attacks; though the number of injured remains unknown. The attack halted half of Saudi Arabia’s daily oil production, representing five percent of global production. Saudi officials and business leaders expect production to return to baseline by the end of September and will tap into reserves to maintain current export levels.

Mudslinging and Dodging Questions in Broken Spanish

The Democratic Party kicked off its quest to find a challenger to President Trump over the summer. In total, four debates took place over four days, due to the large number of candidates. The first two of these debates took place on June 26-27 on NBC, and the second two debates took place on July 30-31 on CNN. Key topics in each debate included healthcare reform, immigration, gun control, race relations, and U.S. foreign policy. Many controversies surrounded the debates, including comments made by former Joe Biden about working together with segregationist Senators. NBC and CNN have also come under fire for the manner in which they have organized the debates, and also the amount of speaking time given to each candidate.

Pringles, Sour Cream and Blindness

Pringles, deli ham, french fries, white bread, a British teenage boy. These all seem like harmless things, but according to Bristol University they are a recipe for blindness. Recently in the United Kingdom a teenage boy’s picky eating habits led to complete vision loss. He would only eat Pringles, french fries from a local restaurant, white bread, and slices of ham. To me, this seems like a completely acceptable diet. It hits every food group: carbs and ham. But according to researchers, this diet’s lack of key nutrients and certain vital vitamins and minerals has the potential to cause optic neuropathy: a fancy, scientific way of saying you’re irreversibly blind.

Keep an Eye on Your Money

You may have heard from your friends in Gabelli or those majoring in economics talking about the “yield curve inversion,” and perhaps simultaneously panicking about their Robinhood or E*Trade accounts. So, the question you are surely asking is “what exactly is the yield curve?” A yield curve is often used by economists and investors as an indication of where the economy is heading. It is associated with a financial instrument known as Treasury bonds.

Olivia Jade says… Eff the Press!

Olivia Jade Giannulli has become the face of the college admissions scandal, and she’s fed up! Rightly so? Let’s find out. A quick recap:

Olivia Jade Giannulli, daughter of Lori Loughlin ,Aunt Becky from Full House, and Mossimo Giannulli ,a guy who designed clothes for target, had been steadily growing her social media influencer career, and her YouTube and Instagram accounts had each amassed over one million followers. Despite her light-hearted daily vlogs and beauty videos, she quickly became the antagonistic mascot of the college admission scandal once news surfaced that her parents had paid around $500,000 for her to attend the University of Southern California under the guise of a sports scholarship.