Vocalizing Your Needs

There you are, sprawled out on Mike from Finite Math’s twin bed. You never thought you’d get here. What began as an innocent invitation to study has become a hot and heavy sexual encounter. Mike is hot as hell, so let’s go full speed ahead. Plus, Mike insists he’s really good at giving head. Alright, let’s see what he’s got. Wait, no. That ain’t it. What the fuck is going on? Mike has no idea what he’s doing. What are you gonna do? Lay there and just wait it out? Pretend you’re into it? NO, you’re gonna show Mike who’s boss and tell him what to do.

Nerds Have a Stranglehold on Fordham

Finally, if all else fails, and nerds do escape from Queen’s Court, we would need to target their laptop computers in order to hinder their nerdy capabilities. Simple DDoS attacks would not suffice to disabling them, as they would certainly have retroactive cell-connection failsafes. No, we would need to brazenly hack past their firewalls into their computer’s mainframes. Initiating green code theta programs and binary distruports would ensure their software run time would lag behind ours. Ensuring that our hackers have accelerated net code will be the final nail in the coffin for those damn nerds.

Reviving the Dead: Why Everyone Should Study Latin

“You’re wasting your time.” These are the words I hear from my roommate every Monday and Thursday as I get ready to go to my Latin class. And every time she says these words I scream, “NO, I’M NOT.” While part of the reason I scream at her is that I am being defensive, the other reason for my screaming is simply because I believe that learning a dead language is useful. Yes, you read that right. Learning Latin is useful. Before all the modern language majors and minors storm at me in rage, let me explain to you why I think everyone should study Latin.