Well, it’s fall, my foot is slowly being melted away by some species of man-eating bacteria, and I jumped into a moving garbage truck this weekend screaming, “It’s taking me to heaven.” My iPod is broken and I spilled a 4th drink on my laptop, killing it once and for all, meaning that all my music may potentially be lost forever. It’s high time to jump into a pile of leaves, chug a little White Horse, and give nature a good cry or two. I could even hum some of the songs that I probably won’t listen to for a long time! Luckily, the computers here at the print shop all have headphone jacks, and I can attest to some really bangin’ records that dropped recently/leaked on these two pages. Plug in, give em a download, and go to town.

In other news, this picture above makes a lot of sense right now, but it’s been a long weekend, and I’m not making any promises. Thank you, Joe McCarthy. The more time you spend on photoshop and the less time you spend huntin’ commies, the better my section turns out.

Read Earwax (PDF version).

Ill-Legal Download List:

“Chinese Democracy” – Guns ‘N Roses
After a fifteen year lapse since “The Spaghetti Incident?”, Guns ‘N Roses has finally released music of its own volition. Now reduced to the sole core member Axl Rose and his amalgamation of premier 80s and 90s artists (including Robin Finck of heyday Nine Inch Nails fame), this first official release shows that an Axl Rose ego-trip, a completely new backing band, and a decade and a half of separation has not tainted the GnR “sound.” Rife with sampling, shredding, and tasty alt-rock riffs lie, or rather, rock underneath Axl Rose’s always-on, angst-ridden, nasally vocals, this is a tune that could just as easily sit along the masterpieces of yore, and is sure to please the fans of they bygone days of Appetite for Destruction and Use Your Illusion I & II.

“Robocop” – Kanye West

RoboCop is a 1987 Cyberpunk film directed by Paul Verhoeven. The film features Peter Weller, Dan O’Herlihy, Kurtwood Smith, Nancy Allen, Miguel Ferrer and Ronny Cox. Set in a crime-ridden Detroit, Michigan, in the near future, RoboCop centers on a police officer who is brutally murdered and subsequently re-created as a super-human cyborg, otherwise known as “RoboCop”. RoboCop explores larger themes regarding the media and human nature in addition to being a big budget action film. It has spawned merchandise, two sequels, four television series and two comic book adaptations.

“Horsetail Feathers”- Final Fantasy

Final Fantasy’s Owen Pallett writes songs composed mainly of his superb vocals, violin and a loop machine, but his upcoming EP Plays to Please goes about things a little bit differently, using a band of 33 classically trained musicians playing everything from bassoon to trumpet. Opener “Horsetail Feathers” begins with a light piano line before a full band crescendo that ends up as the jazzy, almost ragtime melody that carries the rest of the song. But just as things feel a little too bizarre even for Final Fantasy, Pallett’s signature croon enters, singing typically surreal lyrics about being “smarter than a chair” and “picking horsetail feathers from my eyes”. Much of what Pallett sings is absolute nonsense, but his voice and phrasing are so beautiful it hardly matters. The song continues through several tempo changes into a halting finale, but I really have no idea how to talk about even vaguely classical music. Just give it a listen.

“Knifeman” – The Bronx
The Bronx is not from the Bronx. “Knifeman,” one of the tracks off their upcoming third full-length album The Bronx (III) (yes, they have three self-titled albums), shows the Bronx straying away from the standard formula punk rock that dominated their first and second album. This track is a straight spoonful of rock, and Matt Caughthran’s voice compliments the pulsing guitar that repeats for the entire song. With a tasty drum beat to carry it through, the song gets slightly repetetive and lacks some of the restrained energy of their earlier work, but if it is in anyway representative of the tone of the upcoming album, one can be sure that it will be worth it. In other news, the Bronx spends some of their time working as a mariachi band for money, and this alone makes them worthy of some praise.

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