Buckle Up Zoomer, We’re Going to Planet Money

By Jonathon Katz

Did you just blow your trust fund buying TSLA 500 Calls expiring 9/4? Of course you did! And now your Robinhood account shows a fat -100% for all-time gains. But it’s okay because daddy’s going to continue to fund your crippling addiction to out-of-the-money calls expiring the next day. 

Your fat L is due to the fact that the New York Stock Exchange (NYSE) is a supposed reflection of our economy. The manner in which the economy functions, as well as the events which influence it, are what got you here in the first place. Let’s take a moment to try and understand these fundamentals before you gamble away the rest of your inheritance.

For guidance, we can look to NPR’s podcast Planet Money, which has its roots in the 2008 recession. Designed to cater to the layperson and gabillionarire alike, they take the most complicated issues regarding economics and boil them down into twenty to thirty minutes of witty commentary. 

For example, the American economy tanked at the end March following widespread shutdowns caused by the COVID-19 pandemic. In any other normal country, the economy should have continued to falter then slowly recover. Instead, we have seen one of the fastest rallying economies propped up by a two trillion dollar rescue plan. Not sure how this worked? Neither was I, until I listened to the episode “Where Do We Get $2,000,000,000,000?” 

With other recent topics such as the United States Postal Office, masks, personal protective equipment, and America’s for-profit prison system, the term “socioeconomic” couldn’t be more at home. Over the last 12 years, Planet Money has amassed more than one thousand episodes, many of which can be found on Spotify. After a few episodes, you’ll be “investing” faster than the Federal Reserve can print money.

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