Pretty Much the Definition of Tragedy…

The day ended just a little bit darker for us here at the paper, as tragically, the Arena Football League will be canceling their 2009 season. League officials are promising America that we haven’t heard the last from the action packed indoor sport, but rather we are witnessing a period of reorganization and eventual rebirth. This is pretty much what Arena Football is telling America:

However, for the rest of us die hard Arena Football fans out there, this means that the new year will be one that will never see the standing AFL champs the Chicago Rush take on division rivals the Colorado Crush, we’ll never know if Dennison Robertson will keep the golden arm that made him Arena Bowl MVP last year, and we’ll never know, “what is Jon Gruden’s significantly uglier brother doing right now?”

Oh, Arena Football you tried so gloriously to stuff one more sport into America’s already brimming sports hole; you have tried valiantly, and you have succeed where others have failed. It was you, oh great miniature sport of kings, that came closest to approximating the type of fast-paced and violent indoor competition that Paul Verhoven gave us a glimpse at in his opus, Starship Troopers; you brought us closer to a glorious future, and now you are gone… for a single season. And that, friends, is one more reason why 2009 could very well be, the shittiest year of all time. In summation: this is pretty much what Arena Football has done to the year 2009:

-Charles

One thought

  1. The longer arena football remains dormant, the closer Zander Barcalow gets to Johnny Rico’s girl.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s